Action Is A Dividing Line {ToL #2}

The following ramblings were inspired by a comment on my Instagram post by @fitlilbit13 (also check her out here and here!) It just so happens she was good friends with my older sister growing up, but I stumbled on her Instagram (I think via a #basicfitfam hashtag??) without realizing who it was at first! Small world… but I digress…

Back to my indented topic ——> The divisive effects of taking meaningful action.

When you take action, others around you will usually have one of two reactions:

1. They are inspired by the idea of possibility and become motivated to level-up. Your action allows them to recognize and believe in their own capacity to do something, and so they do it. (This stems from a growth/abundance mindset).

2. They feel like their toes are being stepped on because their comfort zone just got rocked. They might not be ready to deal with the action part of an issue they have, or they are jealous they aren’t the one actually out there doing. (This stems from a fixed/scarcity mindset). Since you (most likely unintentionally) just called attention to it, you therefore (probably also unintentionally) become the target of those frustrations.

Both of these reactions reflect what is going on within the other person and how they choose to deal with it. Meaning, neither reaction is actually about us. But while neither reaction has anything to do with us, it is so hard (for me at least) not to take it personally!

When we become the target of misplaced frustration, our own response can become difficult to navigate, but ultimately makes all the difference.

So what should we do about it?

I think our choice has to be to surround ourselves with people that support us, regardless of whether or not they completely “get it.” (Not in a bury-your-head-in-the-sand kind of way that refuses to accept other viewpoints, but in a way that keeps you focused on your process). None of us has the time to waste on negativity when we are chasing big goals. There are people willing to be supportive and encouraging, even when they don’t completely “get it.” whether in physical proximity or the online space, those are your people. They are the people you allow into your mental “inner circle.”

When you make it your practice to be open and authentic, I believe that people will come to you and seek out your opinion if/when they are ready to change, and that’s a win-win scenario. Still, a point of frustration for me has been this: For some reason, people seem to expect that we are judging them and/or intending to sell them on our (unsolicited) ideas and they remain on defense at all times. This is another thing outside of my control. I do my best (not claiming to be perfect here!) to handle this as gracefully as possible, and allow them the wiggle room to get to know me and decide for themselves what my intentions are.

Bottom line: I choose to show up and be authentically me. That involves a willingness to serve others with what I have to offer, but also recognizing that this doesn’t (because it can’t) involve shoving something down their throat before they are ready for it.

Reader questions:

Have you ever encountered this kind of situation?
How do you handle it in a positive way?

|Kaci

Grabbing my Spoons and running to Amanda’s for the ToL linkup!